I became a college student this week.
Yes, it’s true, and I can imagine what you’re thinking right now. “It’s the end of September! What kind of school are you going to that starts their classes so late?”. And if I were you, I’d be thinking the exact same thing. But I will explain.
My classes did in fact start last month – August 28th, to be exact. It happened, but I’d say that I was quite unprepared for college. The summer was not focused on my education, but rather my excessive sleep and several empty promises. I sort of lost my way, I guess. High school tired me out so much and I didn’t know what exactly I wanted to do with myself. I didn’t even decide for sure where I was going to college until early/mid August, and before then, my plan was to just get a job, earn some money and go with the flow. But it wasn’t as easy or as simple as I thought. I had to choose college in order to have some order and a foundation in my life.
A week before classes started and it finally sunk in what was going to happen. College. The official next big step in my life. I’d be looking back at it for my entire life, no doubt. Though I wasn’t prepared and I didn’t like the idea, I decided to just go through the motions, do what I could. “Do what you gotta do so you can do what you wanna do.”
Well, in short, it wasn’t so hot at first. The first day felt normal in an odd way; I hadn’t at all absorbed what was going on. I wasn’t as there as I should’ve been. The whole week was like that, and I just went along with it, treating it as something that I had to just get up and do. And I thought that that would be the whole college experience, and I was thoroughly disappointed. I felt like I didn’t fit in there, like everyone knew what they were doing besides me.
But things got better on their own. Earlier on I’d agreed with myself that I’d try my hardest to make something out of the college experience, to not squander it and get good grades and to actually do something. So I guess that’s when I started having to implement it. More and more work got assigned, and I had to adapt.
And this week is when I realized, it happened. It wasn’t like I instantly became aware and successful in college life, but that I came to a realization. It was just after class on Wednesday, and I was sitting right outside of the library, and I was thinking about all the things I had done. I just left class early. I worked on my homework and studied by myself. I saw a cute girl and wanted to say hi. I evaluated what my days had been spent doing and I realized: I was a college student. The way I acted and the things I did finally reflected it. At that moment I felt it, and it was different than how I’d felt on the 28th of August. And it was okay.
Now I hope I’ve avoided turning this into a meaningless babble about my recent college experience. But I hope you guys understand my feelings, and I’d love to know if any of you have been through anything similar. Comment below with questions or comments; I love to hear about other people’s experiences as well.